:::I originally wrote this post back in 2013 and it’s been updated to reflect my life at this point, being a mama of three and knowing too many people who struggle with infertility:::
Since April Fools’ day is right around the corner, I want to express my thoughts on a popular “joke” that is carried out on social media.
|No, I am not expecting- this is just for blogging purposes|
“OMG, you’re pregnant– How exciting!”
Add another 150 congratulatory comments and 100’s of “Likes”and “Loves”
“HAHAHA.. Just Kiddin’! April Fools’!”
I have been planning to write this post for months now; it’s been rewritten about five times. This isn’t like many of my other upbeat, positive, and humorous mommy posts. It may come off a bit harsh, but at the same time, I want to make sure my point is taken seriously. #ihavenothingbutlove
Simply put- this is wrong on so many levels.. it’s heartless and just plain rude. I hope people who may consider doing this think twice after reading this post or for the people who have done this in the past, I hope you learn something new.
Now, I want you to think about eight of your closest couple friends. Got them in mind?
Out of those eight, one couple will suffer from infertility. This could be your best friend, sister-in-law, sister, cousin, co-worker, neighbor…
According to the National Infertility Association, “Infertility affects 7.3 million people in the U.S. This figure represents 12% of women of childbearing age, or 1 in 8 couples.”
What is infertility? Infertility is defined as the inability to conceive after one year of unprotected intercourse (six months if the woman is over age 35) or the inability to carry a pregnancy to live birth.
Chances are you actually know someone who is unable to become pregnant or carry a baby full term.
Here are some more statistics for you:
-Approximately 44% of women with infertility have sought medical assistance. Of those who seek medical intervention, approximately 65% give birth.
-Approximately 85-90% of infertility cases are treated with drug therapy or surgical procedures.
-Approximately one-third of infertility is attributed to the female partner, one-third attributed to the male partner and one-third is caused by a combination of problems in both partners or, is unexplained.
-For women in their childbearing years, the chances of having a miscarriage can range from 10-25%, and in most healthy women the average is about a 15-20% chance.
I have to admit, when I pregnant with my first child, Sophia, I knew very little about infertility and really didn’t think much of it. The Hubs and I didn’t suffer from any of the above and at first, my naive self didn’t think anyone else did either.
I.Was.Wrong. So, very wrong.
Personally,since becoming a mama, I’ve known over dozens of couples who have/had trouble becoming pregnant, lost a baby, or are currently experiencing challenges conceiving.
I have friends who have miscarried at all stages, even stillbirths, gone through procedures such as having their tubes “cleansed” (which I hear is extremely painful), and taken medication and/or injections to help regulate their ovulation cycle. Not to mention, these procedures, including invitro fertilization (IVF) costs $1,000s of dollars and is emotionally draining.
Do you think my friends or even yours find this “joke” funny when all they want to do is to become a parent and welcome a child into this world? I highly doubt it.
1 out of 8 women suffers from either, not being able to become pregnant or cannot carry a baby full term. Approximately 1 out of 6 women will miscarry during their pregnancy.
Please, please, please consider these numbers before saying, “you’re pregnant” just to get a laugh- honestly, you’re only making yourself look insensitive and uneducated.
You have no idea how much this can hurt someone.
For every 50 of your female FB friends, 8 of them will experience infertility issues.
On April 1st, I will post this PSA as my status on social media platforms, stating:
“PSA: I know it is funny to announce you are pregnant on April Fools’ Day, but take a minute and think about how it may affect someone who is suffering from infertility or the loss of a baby. Thank you.”
Statistics were taken from:
The National Infertility Association website